You and My Future Ex-Wife Are Both Happy

Sometimes It's Good to Go With the eBay Victories

"Why Does My Body Ache?"

"Hard living?"

"Shit, it's easy to live this way."

Sometimes It's Good to Go With the Easy Victories

Correction

She posed for a photo on one of the bronze-plated (I think) blocks designed to keep cars from driving up and bombing the Stock Exchange. She wasn't older than me and was probably younger. New York was a novel and temporary place for her.

I'm Not It

We're Young and We've Got Chops

"instead ___ got ____ in a headlock and then got punched in the face."
"yeah, he had it coming. that guy is weirder than i thought."

"I don't worry about nothing, no, / Cause worrying's a waste of my time."

I Did It!

: \

"i will be whale watching- if we make it to saturday we are going to have to change our boat time to watch the game."

He Was a Hero in His Own Way

They were waiting in the atrium to the church.

"I've never heard you say that about him."

"Bring it up again later and I'll tell you. It's not appropriate to discuss it right now."

The organ began to play.

Preference

"I'm definitely gonna pig out."
"Good."

Correction

"Why the cellophane?"

"Why use condoms? It's not cause they're more fun, It's cause it's not safe without them."

Can It End Well?

It can end well!

I Put Pants On!

I put pants on. I put pants on. I put pants on. I put pants on!

Okay. Breathe. You just put some pants on.

Okay.

Deep breath.

I put pants on.

"I Only Wanted to Be 16, and Free"

Correction

[Said in a park]

"He's always poking me."

"Who, Jonas? Yeah, he's always trying to get me to play scrabble and shit."

[!!!]

Correction

His cell was on speaker. He was striding, slung low, down Willoughby.

"Your checking account balance is - nine dollars and - eleven cents."